An updated parody of a 4-1-9 letter

A forum for posting "You have one the lottery" letters, and for asking whether the e-mail that your received is real (it isn't). Real lotteries do NOT advise winners by e-mail, and they do NOT require the payment of any fees up-front.
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Pottapaug1938
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An updated parody of a 4-1-9 letter

Post by Pottapaug1938 »

Below is an updated parody of a "letter" that showed up last year....

Dear Highly Esteemed American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude. I do this because you are of repute as a correct and esteemed man of honour.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the great and glorious Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who is providing capacious advice to the Ministry of the Treasury. You may know him as the wise and notorious leader of American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transaction is 100% safe.

This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred. I am hoping that you will use your great repute in that capacity and be of aid to us.

Please reply with all of your telephone, bank account, IRA, social insurance programme and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully,
Minister of Treasury Geithner
"We've been attacked by the intelligent, educated segment of the culture." -- Pastor Ray Mummert, Dover, PA, during an attempt to introduce creationism -- er, "intelligent design", into the Dover Public Schools