Quatloos!

Boresha, Swahilian for “to improve.”

Boresha's patented fat-burning coffee has been shown to burn fat up to 800% faster than jogging 2 miles!

Just had to take a closer look at this magic elixir when someone pushing the stuff made this claim on another forum...

When a patient who weighs in at 500lbs begins drinking the thermogenic coffee and during the course of 6 months has burned half his body weight and has been able to go off ALL his diabetic medications, it DOES say something about the effectiveness of the products.

Unless you've had REAL experience with patients who have burned off enough fat to increase their quality of life ... keep your mouth shut.

Lost 250 lbs in 6 months drinking Boresha coffee!

I'm waiting for this chap to get back to me and explain the physiology of fat burning and how the coffee was able to accomplish this.

Did it magically enter the fat cells and burn the fat there, something like Dr. Suzzie's detox juice that flushes fat out of the cells?

Very puzzling.

Boresha Coffee and Skinny Science
are proud to announce the release of
Bskinny Coffee, a patented fat-burning,
thermogenic coffee.

Bskinny Coffee aka Skinny Coffee
has the first and only low glycemic coffee
patent ever awarded.

Of course, no patent #'s included with the ad copy.

Boresha Coffee and Skinny Science
are proud to announce the release of
Bskinny Coffee, a patented fat-burning,
thermogenic coffee.

Bskinny Coffee aka Skinny Coffee
has the first and only low glycemic coffee
patent ever awarded.

Glycemic Index rates the effect carbohydrates have on the bloodsugar. The lower the index number, the slower the carbs will raise your blood sugar.

Since normal black coffee contains next to no carbohydrates, talking about low glycemic coffee makes absolutly no sense. But hey, it's MLM, ya'll.

This gem from a Boresha press release must be deserving of some kind of special prize.

In a large study, coffee was also shown to increase the consumption of very fattening and fatty foods.

Like no shit, really?

Order a coffee in a donut shop and think you just might order some very fattening food to go along with it?

But instead of going after donuts, brownies, muffins, or those sugary flavor syrups everyone's addicted to, they pick on the wonder of coffee. Those bastards!

WTF???

Boresha BSkinny coffee,

Patented Thermogenic Low-Glycemic Fat-Burning Coffee

BSkinny coffee it the first and only coffee drink designed by Blycemic Index Researchers.

Why is this important?

Because coffee causes FAT-STORAGE in humans.

What is the point of energizing the body and stimulating fat-storage at the same time?

The only way to fix coffee so that it does not stimulate fat-storage is to incorporate the Glycemic Index into the equation and to use Buffered Caffeine instead of regular caffeine.

BSkinny coffee contains Patented Buffered Caffeine.

Buffered Caffeine is a Patented Edible Computer Chip that programs the body to burn fat and to create maximum energy, instead of storing fat into adipose tissue fat cells.

Edible Computer Chips that program the body to burn fat????

Boresha's BSkinny - Fat burning coffee -7 days supply

Oh dear. Another wild promoter making claims that the company in no way can vouch for. Bad promoter! Bad!

Computer chips inside me?

Anyone know a good maker of Tinfoil Hats?

Gee, do I feel silly!

Guess I owe someone an apology.

Seems that Edible Computer Chips is an exact science after all!

EdibleComputerChips.com

Bringing you the finest in Nanotechnology.

Just as a computer responds to computer chips, the
human brain responds to computer chips, but the
brain-computer chips are in an edible form. Every
food, drink, Nutraceutical, Pharmaceutical, vitamin, and
mineral ingested by humans is a computer chip. If it enters
the mouth, it is an Edible Computer Chip.

Just so we're clear on this and there is no misunderstanding.

It appears that the "brains" behind this nonsense is one "Dr" Ann de Wees Allen. Who? Well, Boresha crows that she is "Chief of Biomedical Research at the Glycemic Research Institute in Washington, D.C." (where?), "Named the World’s Leading L-Arginine Researcher" (by whom? Boresha?), "Received the first Glycemic Patent ever awarded" (see below), and so forth. Who is this person?

Well, first of all she isn't a physician. She's a "board certified doctor of naturopathy". That's something akin to a "board certified doctor of roots", conferred by the "American Board of Rootsology" which I created five minutes ago. While some states do license naturopaths, health insurance (both private and public) do not cover their "treatments". From the HEW report recommending that Medicare not cover it: "Naturopathic theory and practice are not based on the body of basic knowledge related to health, disease, and health care which has been widely accepted by the scientific community. Moreover, irrespective of its theory, the scope and quality of naturopathic education do not prepare the practitioner to make an adequate diagnosis and provide appropriate treatment." That about sums it up. I would take health advice from "Dr" Gudakunst before "Dr" Allen.

As for the "glycemic patent" - "Dr" Allen has two patents. One is entitled "Composition comprising L-arginine as a muscle growth stimulant and use thereof"; I don't think that's it. The other is "Composition comprising caffeine chromium and fructose for weight control and use thereof"; that looks more likely.

First, a word about patents: The fact that something is patented does not mean that it works. Years ago, the USPTO got tired of granting patents for perpetual motion machines, and instituted a rule: no patent for perpetual motion will be considered unless the inventor provides a model of the machine which functions as advertised for a year. None have been granted since. However, the Patent Office is a busy place, and there are plenty of patents granted for things just as ridiculous as perpetual motion. Here, take a look at this one. It's for an anti-gravity spaceship, granted in 2005. I don't think it works. Maybe some MLM will pick up on it.

Anyway, "Dr" Allen describes her patent as "A composition for the prevention or treatment of weight gain, e.g., obesity, said composition comprising caffeine, fructose and chromium". Now, all coffee contains caffeine, so that can't be what allegedly makes "Boresha" special. Fructose is a component (along with glucose) of sucrose, or table sugar. Fructose is in fact an isomer of glucose (a compound with the same chemical composition but different structure). While there are some differences in fructose and glucose/sucrose metabolism, it is hard to say that one is better (less bad, actually) for you than the other. In fact, while all cells can metabolize glucose, only the liver metabolizes fructose, meaning that high fructose consumption contributes to cirrhotic (fatty) liver. At least one recent study concludes that fructose consumption contributes to obesity.

So that leaves chromium. Problem is that chromium has been shown to be ineffective in treating weight. See here and here, for example. There are more, including this one from one month ago.

Proofreading my post leads to the inescapable conclusion that I overanalyzed. After all, it's obvious bullshit.

Maybe you've gotten it all wrong.

When they say -

Coffee that BURNS FAT !

maybe that means if the coffee is HOT enough and poured over FAT, it will burn. I know hot coffee will burn skin..................

wserra wrote:As for the "glycemic patent" - "Dr" Allen has two patents. One is entitled "Composition comprising L-arginine as a muscle growth stimulant and use thereof"; I don't think that's it. The other is "Composition comprising caffeine chromium and fructose for weight control and use thereof"; that looks more likely.

Yes, I noticed also that she has two patents filed with the United States Patent Office - not the 50 or so she claims on her website - Dr. Ann de Wees Allen Patents.

Puzzling (among many claims made in the description of United States Patent 5480657) is this head scratcher:

... for every one pound of body fat lost, three pounds by weight are lost.

Considering that body fat contains ~ 10% water, I don't see how her numbers add up or come even close to what she claims.

Watch this FAUX News interview with "Dr." Ann de Wees Allen where she claims Black Coffee Makes You "Fatter Than A Pig" and is worse than eating five hot fudge sundaes.

FOX News Reports: Black Coffee Makes You "Fatter Than A Pig"

"This segment is a textbook example of how not to do science journalism. The voice over identifies de Wees Allen as "Doctor"--without mentioning that she claims neither a medical degree, nor a doctorate. Her website says she's a doctor of naturopathy. Fox also neglects to mention that Allen appears to have a sideline selling something called "Skinny Coffee"--an alternative to that fattening old joe."

Naturopath tells Fox viewers that coffee will make them fat

It should be noted that on a follow up, a real dietitian disagreed with "Dr." Allen's assertions.