Yet Another CtC Success Story!

[Quixote]

She said before she could help me that I had to fill out the paper work, 1040, finacial statement, bank statement, ect, ect.

I told here that I had a problem with all this because there didn't seem to be a law that required me to do these things.

Technically Charles X is correct. No law requires that he do all that before the Taxpayer Advocate Service can help him. All the paperwork described is required by IRS policy as a prerequisite to any alternative collection method, but not required by law. Local advocates can order (in practice, it's actually a request) a modification of any IRS procedure, if that procedure is causing the taxpayer a hardship. Requiring the taxpayer to follow reasonable procedures does, however, serve as a gauge of the taxpayer's sincerity. Any reasonable person actually suffering due to a levy on his social security benefits would be more than willing to complete a little paperwork to have it stopped.

[The Observer]

While we were talking I looked it up, and I said to her did you know that 6020 (b) gets it's authority from Alcohol, tobacco, and Fire Arms. She said it didn't matter that was the law.

I ask her, well in order for the law to apply to me do I need to go out and get a license for alcohol tobacco, and fire Arms.

And the evil plan to convert him into a Virgin Islands Gunsmith begins to take shape...

[webhick]

Those shape-shifting Illuminati lizards can be a sneaky group of s.o.b.s

But they're lots of fun at parties.

[Cobalt Shiva]

I have never been under a levy. I have been on a levee.

Did you drive your Chevy to the levee?

(Evil cackle as I plant the earwig)

The ONLY version to listen to is the full, nearly 8 minute version:

A long, long time ago I can still remember how that music used to make me smile and I knew if I had my chance that I could make those people dance and maybe they'd be happy for a while but February made me shiver with every paper I delivered, bad news on the door step, I couldn't take one more step, I can't remember if I cried when I read about his widowed bride but something touched me deep inside, the day, the music, died. So...
CHORUS
Bye, bye Miss American Pie drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry an them good ol' boys were drinkin whiskey and rye singin this will be the day that I die, this will be the day that I die.

Did you write the book of love and do you have faith in God above, if the bible tells you so, and do you believe in rock n' roll, can music save your mortal soul and can you teach me how to dance real slow? Well I know that you're in love with him cuz I saw you dancin in the gym you both kicked off your shoes and I dig those rhythm and blues. I was a lonely teenage bronkin buck with a pink carnation and a pick up truck but I knew I was out of luck, the day, the music, died. I started singin...

Chorus

Now for ten years we've been on our own and moss grows fat on a rollin stone but that's not how it used to be, when the jester sang for the king and queen in a coat he borrowed from James Dean and a voice that came from you and me, oh and while the king was looking down, the jester stole his thorny crown the courtroom was adjourned, no verdict was returned, and while Lenin read a book on Marx, the quartet practiced in the park and we sang dirges in the dark, the day, the music, died. We were singin...

Chorus

Helter Skelter in a summer swelter the birds flew off with a fallout shelter, eight miles high and fallin fast, its the land that falled on the grass the players tried for a forward pass with the jester on the sidelines in a cast, now the half-time air was sweet perfume while the sergeants played a marching tune we all got up to dance oh but we never got the chance oh as the players tried to take the field the marching band refused to yield do you recall what was revealed, the day, the music, died. We started singin...

Chorus

Oh and there we were all in one place, a generation lost in space with no time left to start again, so come on, Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack Flash sat on a candle stick because fire is the devils only friend, oh and as I watched him on the stage, my hands were clinched in fists of rage, no angel born in hell could break that satan's spell and as the planes climbed high into the night to light the sacrificial right I saw satan laughing with delight, the day, the music, died. He was singin...

Chorus

I met a girl who sang the blues and I asked her for some happy news but she just smiled and turned away, I went down to the sacred store where I'd heard the music years before but the man there said the music wouldn't play and in the streets the children screamed, the lovers cried, and the poets dreamed but not a word was spoken, the church bells all were broken and the three men I admire most, the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost, they caught the last train for the coast, the day, the music, died, and they were singin...

Chorus

They were singin... Bye, bye Miss American Pie drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry an them good ol' boys were drinkin whiskey and rye singin this will be the day that I die.

I prefer Weird Al's version . . .

My, my, this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
but now he's just a small fry . . .

[webhick]

I prefer Weird Al's version . . .

My, my, this here Anakin guy
Maybe Vader someday later
but now he's just a small fry . . .

"The Saga Begins"

A long, long time ago
In a galaxy far away
Naboo was under an attack
And I thought me and Qui-Gon Jinn
Could talk the federation into
Maybe cutting them a little slack
But their response, it didn't thrill us
They locked the doors and tried to kill us
We escaped from that gas
Then met Jar Jar and Boss Nass
We took a bongo from the scene
And we went to Theed to see the Queen
We all wound up on Tatooine
That's where we found this boy...

Oh my my this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"

Did you know this junkyard slave
Isn't even old enough to shave
But he can use the Force, they say
Ahh, do you see him hitting on the queen
Though he's just nine and she's fourteen
Yah, he's probably gonna marry her someday
Well, I know he built C-3PO
And I've heard how fast his pod can go
And we were broke, it's true
So we made a wager or two
He was a prepubescent flyin' ace
And the minute Jabba started off that race
Well, I knew who would win first place
Oh yes, it was our boy

We started singin' ...
My my this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"

Now we finally got to Coruscant
The Jedi Council we knew would want
To see how good the boy could be
So we took him there and we told the tale
How his midi-chlorians were off the scale
And he might fulfill that prophecy
Oh, the Council was impressed, of course
Could he bring balance to the Force?
They interview the kid
Oh, training they forbid
Because Yoda sensed in him much fear
And Qui-Gon said "Now listen here"
"Just stick it in your pointy ear"
"I still will teach this boy"

He was singin' ...
My my this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"

We caught a ride back to Naboo
'Cause Queen Amidala wanted to
I frankly would've liked to stay
We all fought in that epic war
And it wasn't long at all before
Little Hotshot flew his plane and saved the day
And in the end some Gunguns died
Some ships blew up and some pilots fried
A lot of folks were croakin'
The battle droids were broken
And the Jedi I admire most
Met up with Darth Maul and now he's toast
Well, I'm still here and he's a ghost
I guess I'll train this boy

And I was singin' ...
My my this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"
"Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"

We were singin' ...
My my this here Anakin guy
May be Vader someday later - now he's just a small fry
And he left his home and kissed his mommy goodbye
Sayin' "Soon I'm gonna be a Jedi"

[1 of Them]

It just keeps getting worse for this guy.

Charles X wrote:

I went to legal Aid and they wanted me to fill out an application and one of the first questions was, "are you a U.S. citizen"?

Does that question mean anything other than a 14th Amendment U.S. citizen?

Has anyone seen a defintion of U.S. citizen that includes the Citizen of the 50 States of the union?

They said they couldn't help me if I weren't a U.S. citizen.

The extensive litigation concerning American Indians illustrates that consent rather than place of birth is what controls citizenship. Indians did not receive citizenship until conferred by congressional acts in 1887, 1901 and 1924, long after ratification of the Fourteenth Amendment.

I'd like to say I feel sorry for the guy, but he's way beyond that now.

[Joey Smith]

Like the Sooeeeyjurians, the Lostheads seem to be dumber than your average TPs, which of course is a very low standard to begin with.

[grixit]

"The Saga Begins"

[deletions]

Heh. The Trade Federation gurus didn't want to pay taxes so they enlisted a large number of really dumb robots as their foot soldiers.

Oh wait-- did i accidently drag us back on topic?